A couple notes from my holiday season (or, the Yule Blog):
–Went into a Wal-Mart for the first time, accompanying Karen as she bought a Christmas tree stand. There was just the massivest pile–more of a tower, really–of stick-on bows, occupying a 15-foot-tall cage. We decided that it’s where they dispose of the union leaders. The best part of the trip was that, as Karen picked out a stand, I got to ask, “Are you sure you don’t want to get an illuminated donkey this year?” There it was, in a clearly-labelled box–Illuminated Donkey. For nativity displays, I sorely hope.
–It’s always disconcerting around this time to see that the newspapers are talking about “last-minute shoppers” and the ads ask if we need to do any “last-minute shopping.” It’s disconcerting because I’ve basically done no shopping. What is this “last minute” crap? There’s like six days left. Once it’s December 23rd, that will be the “last minute.” (At that point I still will have done very little shopping.)
–After talking about my Christmas list crisis on this space last week, I have another killer idea: who wants to make an Imaginary Christmas list? It’s a list of gifts you want that don’t exist. They can be completely fantastical or they can be feasible but unavailable. The flagship item on mine: A special edition DVD of “Airplane,” which would just like the original movie except it doesn’t have Johnny, that annoying guy who I guess is supposed to be gay.