True Tales of Tomemos Cleverness, Volume N: Tonight I was out playing Apples to Apples at a friend’s house, and an acquaintance came in wearing a clever t-shirt. It had a picture of Shakespeare’s face, and below it the text said “Prose before hoes.” I couldn’t read it clearly at first, so I asked, “Hey, Alex, what does your shirt say?”
“It says ‘Prose before hoes,'” Alex said.
“That’s funny,” I said. “Because Shakespeare wrote almost no prose. Everything he wrote was poetry and drama.”
You might expect that the general reaction to this was silent looks of incredulous annoyance. But no, the entire room burst into laughter and cries of “Good point!” Alex’s reaction, fairly enough, was, “I hate graduate students.” And who wouldn’t?
By the way, while we’re on the topic of my cleverness, my best Apples to Apples win that night (and maybe ever) was on the adjective “Confused.” I won it by playing a card that, I said, was the very embodiment of confusion. The card was “Confucius.”
(Title courtesy of Dutch Missionary Records.)